Them’s posh fighting words

vs.

Now I’m not going to pretend like I hate 50 Cent like so many are willing to do. Occasionally the guy can spit; and while it’s not often that he comes up with lines like “I love you like a fat kid loves cake,” his best songs are among my favorite commercial hip-hop songs from their respective years (“Love It Or Hate It” is a prime example).

But I don’t know what it says about a rapper when Perez Hilton is the first to notice a new diss track. From the sounds of it, this is from a newish DJ Kay Slay mix. On it, 50 rattles through lines quicker than I’ve ever heard him rhyme, clipping off syllables to keep up with the “It’s Bigger Than Hip-Hop” beat. The first half is purely brags about gun-toting, money-stacking and chrome-having, getting three requirements out of the way quickly. And it’s really not aimed at anyone, just popping off shots at the competition.

Things take a paranoid turn with “Who shot Biggie Smalls? We don’t get them they gon’ kill us all,” then drops some blame squarely on P. Diddy and the West coast. Dropping cadence, 50 just starts yelling with tons of reverb in what might be a cave or stretch Escalade. “I guess this means I won’t be invited to the white parties in the Hamptons,” he crows, “I don’t give a fuck” before revealing the issue at hand: contract negotiations over Mase. Like a spoiled child, 50 pushes the deal away (“I don’t wanna do the deal no more, fuck the deal”) before airing all the dirty laundry about travel fees and lodging costs, etc. It’s no longer a diss track, it’s a one-sided shouting match that Diddy will never respond to — the guy gets paid to piss on camera. This track would be far more relevant and impressive if Mr. Cent would have maintained his cool and kept rapping his business concerns. Someone should remind him he was on the “Hail Mary” Ja Rule diss track (another sitting duck, but entertaining nonetheless), so he will just rhyme, not whine.

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